This blog is a close sibling to my recent one titled addiction, for they are in many ways the same- a cause and effect.
Addiction is a co-dependence to a non earned dopamine rush while the distraction that it provides is a choice.
In essence “Distraction” is avoidance. What are we avoiding? An injustice done unto us as a child or a teenager? Wronged somehow by a parent, relative, a friend or spouse? Do we avoid confronting a problem or conflict in our lives?
Being a stylist affords me the opportunity to listen to my clients, all their concerns and secrets are revealed to me in confidence. In the end, we all have the same problems and fears, and we cope with them in the same way… By avoidance and by distraction… (these however vary)
Unhappiness (issues) in marriages (relationships) where both partners know something is wrong yet continue functioning like all is well. Low self confidence, lack of self love and feelings of unworthiness, anger, fear and sadness, shame and guilt…. afflict us all at some point. We avoid facing these limiting beliefs and emotions by seeking instant gratification and pleasure…. Distractions…. that could lead to addiction.
As humans we avoid painful experiences and move towards pleasureful ones. There are so many ways we can do this. How do you escape the pain? The vodka bottle in the freezer, a bottle of wine, smoking weed, with a rolled up bill? Or how about watching T.V.? Maybe you like surfing the net or checking Facebook and Twitter every 5 min?
Food is also a great way… a bag a chips, candy… mmm pizza! Gossip, trashy tabloids? Sex is an awesome way as well, how many times (partners) how random? Some like having affairs- there’s nothing like getting jacked up on the “newness feelings” that is until it wears off…. So have another one! Maybe going shopping does it for you, or perhaps the pursuit of money will quell the discomfort or the void.
Hey maybe you are better than that, you’d never do anything sketchy or immoral, no you eat healthy and exercise. You go to church and lead a spiritual life yes? These can be vices too…..
Orthorexia nervosa (also known as orthorexia) is a proposed eating disorder or mental disorder characterized by an extreme or excessive preoccupation with avoiding foods perceived to be unhealthy. Exercising too much is another way of escapism. So is running off to church or to a cave to meditate.
Balance is key!
The way to heal from the wounds (that we pretend aren’t there) is to stop denying them and allow these hidden traumas to surface. They want to be seen and recognized. If they are ignored they will eventually get your attention and manifest as a disease of some kind.
Shamans and energy healers are all aware of this process and will often isolate and remove all the patients belongings in order to initiate this process. A breakdown usually occurs as withdrawal happens. Pain, anger irritability confusion and panic arise – as they are now left to deal with the issue(s) without any way of avoiding them. I experienced this to a lesser degree from my recent juice fast.
There is no where to hide, you are raw and naked. You have no choice but to face it all! Could you handle such a thing? Would you want to?
Try going for a long walk in a forest or wooded area, no cell phone or any thing that can take you away from being alone and in nature. (away from the NOW) Go camping with no radio or electronics of any kind. You will be left with you and only you….. All your shit will start to surface. You’ll see what needs tending to…. Give it your full attention, allow it to be.
Once you give an audience to an issue it will start dissolving away, and healIng begins. By avoiding it, you strengthen it, and it will force you to “pay” attention to it.
We all avoid things in our lives, and no one is immune from doing so. However there comes a point in time when one decides to take control and make a change. I know I have and I’m doing my best to do that. Again i don’t know where this will take me however my intent is to do so with transparency, authenticity and with full accountability.
Thank you for reading my blog.
I bid you a happy day full of joy and gratitude.